Two good classes in a row, but wow did I pay for it today. I was a bit tired as I arrived to the late class (was going to the 6pm but got held back at work). I thought it’ll be okay I’ll wake up around awkward the way you do in morning classes, boy was I wrong. Just at the start of class I thought I don’t want to be here, lets just leave now. However convinced myself to stay only to find in Pranayama that I couldn’t pull in my stomach, it was solid rock and would not move an inch. Other than that and being very stiff in general (worse than a morning class) the standing series was alright. Thought that class wouldn’t be so bad after all. That’s when I realise what the issue would be in this class, Savasana. I actually started arguing with myself internally if it was possible to sit it out. I was doing fairly fine in posture but as soon as I hit savasana the heat got to me, my entire body turned in to one huge muscle beating in sync with the heart (I’m not joking here, every single muscle contracted and released ever beat). All the movement was giving me motion sickness.
Of course Jessica was full of useful corrections as always but I think today they just went straight past me. Somewhere around Camel I didn’t have enough energy left in the above mentioned stomach to do the sit ups. But I managed to do at least one set of every posture through out. In the end I was so tired I couldn’t hear the teachers words. I heard that she was talking but I could not for the life of me make out a single one of the words. Just did the rest of the series on internal dialogue.
A good nights sleep and hopefully the body will feel better tomorrow, Goodnight.
Focused on my beginners mantra again today and it turned into another beautiful class. I will try this for a couple of days more and then we’ll see what needs to be worked on next. I’ve noticed that as soon as I write something down in the blog the opposite seems to happen in the following class. I wonder if it’s because I’ve had an outlet for the thought and emotions or if it’s just a coincident.
I was in a meeting today when one of the other people there suddenly said: “Wow what did you just do? It looked like someone grabbed your hair and pulled you towards the ceiling”. To which my boss replied: “That would be his Crazy yoga”. I realised I do that quite often during the day, just straighten my posture out. But it was weird to hear someone else (non-yogini) using something that sounded like it came straight out the dialogue.
The mantra for today’s class was “be a beginner”. What I mean by that is let go of all expectations as if I’d never done the posture before and just listen to the dialogue. That definitely helped. I felt much better about today’s class. Obviously I wasn’t completely successful in letting go but I think this will be worth working on for the rest of the week. As I said yesterday it not so much the depth I’ve been attached to (although there is a fair share of that too) it’s the corrections.
I was so negative about today’s class on the way there, it really felt like a slump. Switched back to listening to Michael Franti (from whom the title of the post is) who I normally find very uplifting and everything sounded so depressing. That’s when I realised it was all about mind state. Flipped forward until I found a song that’s impossible to find depressing and started focusing on the happy feelings. Narrow focus, still mind, voila better mood.
Those two things together worked some magic and I had such an easy class. Which considering almost everyone else was dyeing in there was saying something. Even though Diane is one of the teachers most in love with a hot class she went to open the door already in first set awkward. It must have been scorching.
Feels like I’ve lost touch with the yoga. Not in the sense that I want to give up on the challenge or that it’s become a chore. More like it’s something I do on autopilot. I guess that’s been noticeable in the blog posts as well. They’ve been shorter partly due to lack of time, partly because there has been very little to say. This is part of what I started to talk about yesterday when I mentioned that I needed to go the back row and humble up a bit. I need to come to terms with my practice again and find where I am.
Another thing that’s been playing on my mind is this new found attachment to all the corrections I’ve been give over the (almost) last two months. The part in How Yoga Works (thanks to TheDancingJ for the tip) where they talk about corrections have been weighting on my mind, they say: Making mistakes is alright unless it’s something your teacher has already pointed out to you. I think I’ve taken it to literally and between all the teachers I’ve had I’ve managed to amass an impressive amount of corrections. Just trying to fit them all in is enough to not have time to do the actually posture in some cases. I need to let go, go back to basics and just follow the dialogue and try to fall down backwards.
Ahh the crazies how I wish we could get past you and on to enjoying our greatly improved practice. My body and practice is changing in ways I couldn’t have fantom before this challenge started. I looked down at my legs today in triangle and oh my god is that my quads? The looked more like something I’d expect on the governator, not my lithe little body. Seriously conflicted about that, I didn’t set out to start building a muscle temple. But I guess it’s all good.
Decided to visit the sister studio today. It’s a bigger newer version of my current home studio. In many ways it was the same, but in others it was easy to see where they had learned from the first one. So although it was nicer in many ways I think I prefer the cozy feeling of Fulham.
After the double yesterday I came home around 8:30pm and thought I’d have short nap. Set the alarm for 45 min later. Promptly turned it off when it came on and fell back asleep. Woke up around 7 this morning with my body in all kinds of aches. Decided to sleep some more, woke up again 8:30 and my body was fine. Yoga hangover or maybe I just needed a load of sleep. Also went to see Avatar yesterday and for some reason the film keeps mixing in with my thought today. I must admit the film was very yogic in some ways, maybe that’s what’s playing with my mind. That was all my excuses for not blogging yesterday.
Today’s class as predicted was a full rodeo show, was being thrown all around the room and ended up feeling a bit like I’d been kicked in the chest. The yoga bull was helped along by a very energetic teacher. I don’t think I’ve ever seen that kind of pace in pranayama breathing before. Got exactly the same correction in one of the postures today as in the first class yesterday so I guess I really need to pay attention there. It felt like I wasn’t doing the class or my own practice proud today, maybe I need a class or two in the back row again to humble up.
Last night I had a yoga dream. Was in class but something wasn’t right. At first I thought I just wasn’t focused enough and kept forgetting what posture we were on. But after a while I realised I was in the advanced class an nobody would tell me what was going on or what I should be doing. Anxiety anyone? Maybe this was somehow related to the other day in class when I was setting up for rabbit and for the life of me I could not remember what to do with my arms. For some reason my brain blanked and I couldn’t hear the teacher. I went through about 5-8 different variations before I realised I could just look around to see what everybody else was doing.
For all the talk about how I got run over in class I still considered doing another double today up until about 10 min before I had to leave to make the last class of the day. BTW, I’m not doing the doubles out of just insanity. I’m trying to get used to them before Barcelona, were we will have 7 days straight of doubles. Only two weeks to go.
Classes 46 & 47
Teacher Liz & Michael
Did my first ever back to back today (err, yesterday). Guess what, I loved it. It’s a good thing there was a 1 hour break after second class otherwise I think I would have stayed for a triple. Let’s keep it one step at a time.The first class was fairly good, not rockstar but definitely above average. However the second class, beautiful. It felt like my body knew what to do so I didn’t have to stay on top of it. I could just let everything go and relax.
Absolute rockstar class today. That’s been a long time in the making, but whoa! The energy in the room in general was great, even though there wasn’t that many people (16 out of a possible 59). Around the halfway point someone piped up and asked for more heat. Andrew just went, more heat? And basically everyone as a chorus went ‘Yes please!’. He’d just been to turn off the heater, so back on it went. Still didn’t feel hot but he was saying by the end of class it was exceptionally hot in the room. I can only describe it as magic.
I don’t know how to describe todays class. A bad attempt would be to say I had loads of energy but no energy. It was boiling hot, but not warmer than your normal air coned office. But it was something completely different than that. The only part I can describe was the first few postures where I felt like a total beginner. This class was also the first class ever where I’ve been tempted to leave the room. But I managed to talk myself of that cliff. It’ll be interesting to see what tomorrow brings.
Brought N from work back for her third class today, but when we arrived the class was already full. So she went home, and I stayed around for the late class. Second late class this week, they are alright the biggest problem is dinner, there isn’t enough time before and I get home after 11pm. Today was a blessed smooth class, no scorching heat and no lack of energy to drag me down. First water free class in ages (well since saturday).
I paid extra attention to how I am breathing in class, after Greg’s post about the subject. My breathing is becoming very even. The two trouble spots in class seems to be at standing separate leg to knee and in third part of stretching at the end. The stretching is also the posture I’m the least at peace with, I don’t know why. It doesn’t seem to be due to expectations, this posture has improved heaps and I’m super happy with were it is at. It’s improving at the same rate as pada hastasana, which is all one can ask for. I tried really relaxing into it today but it was still the same laboured breathing and feeling that I didn’t want to be in the posture.
Another hot class with an apperance of the yoga truck. Not as bad as yesterday so I’ll take that improvement. By the way have I mentioned yesterday was insane. Biggest problem today was after class while sitting down in reception I was close to passing out. Blood sugar levels way to low, I thought I’d been eating enough but alas. To be honest I haven’t paid attention to what I eat in the same way as I did the first 30 days. Maybe I need to do a review and start paying attention again. For today a coconut water and banana solve the immediate problem. Bananas has become my diet antibiotic style fix it all. Haven’t had enough to eat during the day have a banana, crash after class have a banana, need a quick breakfast have a banana. You get the picture.
Got thinking about how the challenge itself is changing today. No earth shattering revelations, but I noticed that time has now changed. The first 30 days just felt like they went on for ever and there was no progress. Now I’m wondering were the last 10 days went? Classes are just flying past.
I’m thinking about maybe making a mini challenge out of visiting all the certified studios in England. There is 13 in total (with another one opening end of feb). I’ve been to 3 of them already, so 10 (11) to go and 8 weeks to do it (one week is a in Barcelona so it doesn’t count). For the London ones I should be able to do more than 1 a week so it sounds doable. Could be fun and 3 of the studios are in towns I haven’t been to.
Got a pair of Max shorts as per ActionJoJo‘s recommendation the other day when I was in Brighton. The studio down there happened to sell them. Very nice but I think I still prefer Shakti.